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WOWWWWW!

Can't believe I finally took the plunge into BLOG WORLD WORLD WORLD... I even hear an echo. So since this is my very first blog, allow me to introduce myself and my reasoning behind the creation of this blog. Hi there! I'm Shoma! Yes I said Shoma so I don't wanna here any quip remarks about my name. Like, is that your real name? Why would your parents name you that? etc etc blah blah blah. Growing up I heard every possible joke one could imagine about this "unusual" name swimming in a sea of Becky's. I was teased relentlessly by classmates, strangers and even family...i.e. my older brother. Don't they just annoy you sometimes? Hehehe, just kidding; I mean without them who would we younger siblings tattle or spy on? So I gueesssss it's a fair trade. Back to my "name" issues. When the movie The Last Dragon came out I became an honorary cast member by proxy that is. That famous line: Now, when I say, "Who's da mastah?" you say, "Sho'nuff!" became, "Who's da mastah? SHOMA!!!" That line became the soundtrack of my life. I've been called Shona, Shana, Shirma, Shuma, Shama, Shan, etc; I'm sure you get the point. To this day I have a cousin and an aunt in-law who can't pronounce my name which baffles me because it's quite simple and pronounced just the way it's spelled--- (Show-Ma). See, that wasn't hard or even tongue twisting; I could understand if my name was Castelbajacandjackandjill, now with that I would be able to understand the difficulty. These name teasers have left me so emotionally scarred I was forced to vent through a blog. I kid, I kid. I'm a Leo so I'm prone to dramatics but Shhhhhhh... let's keep that between us; no one else needs to know that about this prideful lioness.

In the last year I've gone through several changes in my life. From the loss of a job I loved to the break down of a relationship (good riddance) I thought I needed. Just had to put that good riddance part in there, I mean it fits so well don't ya think? These major life changes prompted me to take a long hard look at myself and my life and the direction I was heading in. To tell you the honest truth I didn't like what I saw. I mean, I knew what I wanted for my life and had goals and all that good stuff but I was clueless about how I planned to get there. It took being unemployed and heartbroken to set me on the straight and narrow. I re-organized my life mentally, emotionally, physically and most importantly, spiritually. I was where I thought I wanted to be, with whom I thought I wanted to be with but I was only kidding myself. I wanted and needed so much more than what I had. On one of those long tear filled days while mourning the loss of my relationship I realized I was settling and not aiming for the sky. I was selling myself short because I loved this man and didn't realize it until the relationship was over, that he didn't deserve that love. I scoured the web looking for tips on how to get over an ex or breakup as if expecting to find that magic wand or that lucky charm that would wipe my pain away. I searched, I read, I cried, I slept but nothing helped; I thought about my pain day and night; night and day, as if replaying a broken record not being able to help doing otherwise. Then one day it hit me like an elephant, yes elephant, so you know that's hard, why am I crying over this f@#$ face when he surely isn't crying over me? I did one last search on how to be truly over and done with a past relationship and came across the amazing blogger at baggagereclaim.co.uk ; her advice was to better yourself, your situation and your circumstances. In one post she suggested writing a letter to your ex about your feelings and so forth with the exception of mailing it. This letter would serve as a reminder of your past and an avoidance guide for future relationships. I did just that and went a step further. I went so far as to create this blog as a reminder of my past and a guide to all things bright for the future. Now I'm not saying I'm ready to swim or even dip into the dating pond yet but I'm certain that when I am, I'll be  million times wiser in the decisions I make. My ex has now become the ruler of measurement for all future relationships. Any man displaying any of his characteristics is not the man for me...NEXT!!! Hehehe... I'm still a work in progress but with God all things are possible and that's all I can ask for. I ask is that you take a hard look at yourself and your circumstances and realize that nothing is permanent. If it doesn't fit, don't force it; whether it be a career, relationship, friendship etc. Above all else, always remember, "to thine own self be true".

Signed Your Conscience...